CORRECTING VS CRITICISM

Remember that children deeply fear ridicule and criticism. When you make fun of a child, he/she plummets into the anger-resentment/revenge cycle. There is a huge difference between correcting behavior and criticism:

Correcting behavior: "We have a rule that you put your napkin in your lap before you eat. Please put your napkin in your lap.”

Criticism: "I've told you every night. Put your napkin in your lap. Everyone else manages to put their napkin in their lap, why can't you?"

Criticism has blame attached to it. Correction is teaching. Blame creates guilt.  A child fogs out when guilt is involved A child can take in and assimilate a loving correction. Watch which words you choose, what body language you use, and whether you use un-necessary anger when you are correcting behavior.

Copyright (C) Sandy Spurgeon McDaniel, 2000